Facing my fears...

Job was considered by God to be a righteous man, and yet Job had fear.He feared something happening to his children. He feared failing health. He feared losing everything. He had lived according to God's laws, had worshiped God rather than his possessions, and still he was afflicted. Who can criticize Job for his reaction? How many of us have lost everything-including our children, health, and possessions? How would we respond to such a horrible situation? The word says, that when the thing we fear most comes upon us, the only way to react is to praise God in the midst of it. That doesn't mean we have to act as though nothing bad has happened. Besides, healthy grief is important, right? "Praise ye the Lord, Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord, that deighteth greatly in his commandments. He shall not be afraid of evil tidings: his heart is fixed, trusting in the Lord. (Psalm 112:1,7)

I have been overwhelmed with fear this summer. Over the loss of my job and not knowing exactly what I should do. I was trying to be patient but it was so hard. God showed me in His marvelous word over and over to wait and be patient, why was it so hard for me? I have been mostly overwhelmed about Jason and his calling to be a Missionary. I know that might sound a bit off from a few months ago when I was thrilled to death about our new journey. The fear has set in and I am trying so hard to be strong and make the right decisions. I grew mad that God called Jason to the Missionary field a few weeks ago. Don't know how that came about but it did. Then I got angry about how he will be going to work, then to school and not be home until after the kids are in bed 4 days a week for 4 years. Me having to work again and do ALL the errands by myself without my sidekick.  Don't know how that anger came about but it did. I grew mad that we were going to have to sell pretty much everything we have when we move to Alaska. The beautiful house that we built together as a family, all the time that we have put into everything here and all of our memories. I know God gave us this house and it's His, but I just adore our little "home". I keep thinking that it's just a house, and our stuff are just possessions and I shouldn't put them before anything that God has set for us. But my heart aches. I'm scared now. Fear has set in. I fear the unknown of not being able to plan accordingly like I always have. I need to be patient and trust in Him as He shows me daily. I want to so bad, but my heart aches. I love Him so much and I will do whatever He wants for us to do. So...I just tell Him my fears now, and plead with Him on certain levels, and pray for guidance, change adjustment, trust, patience, understanding, safety  for our whole family. I want to be a strong person like Job. God has shown me these scriptures about Job for the last two weeks. I know He is trying to console me. My love grows stronger for Him everyday. Please pray for us. "For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me. I was not in safety, neither had I rest, neither was I quiet; yet trouble came."Job 3:25-26


On another note...please send reinforcement- my bedroom has been hijacked by the "Wee cycled Wear preparation team". That's right, trying to hang, sort, and tag all of Jasy's outgrown clothes to drop off Sunday for their upcoming sale. I love to shop there but BOY how I despise to get things ready!